Sunday, June 22, 2008

Hee's market value sky-rocketed to $77million after wonder goal

After scoring a wonder goal never seen before by any living human beings, animals and plants, Hee's market value has sky-rocketed to $77 million.

Strong rumours also came out from the Bernabeau Stadium that Real Madrid has given up its pursuit of THAT Portugese monkey. Instead, Real Madrid is lining up a bid for Hee and ARFC Board of Directors is now seriously considering the transfer.

ARFC powered to 6-3 victory

Playing on the Damai SS pitch for the very first time, ARFC overcame an early setback to crush its opponents 6-3 in front of the watching 77,777 ARFC faithful fans including Dora and Marco Mak, 2 hyper-active kids, and Haron’s wife, Su, and daughter Afiqah and Su’s mother.

ARFC welcomed back several stalwarts who were missing from last week’s match, namely Sebastian, Tjioe, Elvis and Huiming. David also made a long-awaited comeback with his appearance. As Haron and Soon were late, ARFC started with this line-up:

Keeper: Dependable Jinzhong
Right-back: Determined Huiming
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Hardworking Tong
Centre-mid: Hardman Tjioe
Centre-mid: Influential Sebastian
Left-mid: Unpredictable Blackburn
Striker: Speedy Hee
Striker: Powerful Alvin

Subs: ARFC scoring legend Haron
Dynamic Soon
Reliable David

Prior to the match, Huiming and David were rewarded with a swarvoski crystal trophy in recognition of them being the pioneer ARFC warrior.

ARFC immediately wrest control of the match right from the kick-off and they were defending desperately to prevent ARFC from scoring.

In the 7th min, off their very first attack, the opponents opened the scoring. 0-1.

ARFC, however, did not panic as the warriors know their pedigree. Just minutes after going one goal down, ARFC equalized. Blackburn was fouled at the left-hand side and Sebastian took the free-kick. His lob ball almost hung in the air for about 7 seconds and Tjioe out-jumped their keeper to head in for his 41st ARFC goal.

Less than 7 mins later, ARFC went ahead like a carbon-copy goal of the first, but this time it came from the right side. Tong, who had a superb match, won a free-kick after being fouled near the right touch-line and corner spot. Sebastian again stepped up and whipped in a wicked ball and Tjioe simply had to power home with his head for his 42nd ARFC goal. Fantastic!!

Tjioe and Sebastian were soon tiring and had to be replaced by both Soon and Haron respectively. Alvin was also replaced by David after taking a slight knock.

ARFC threatened to score again but some chances were squandered. Half-time score 2-1.
In the 2nd half, Sebastian and Alvin came on to place Hee and Blackburn.

ARFC continued its relentless assault on the opponents’ goal. Just 7 mins after the re-start, ARFC got its 3rd goal. Sebastian’s delightful Jamie Redknapp’s through pass saw Haron breaking free. However, he dragged the ball too wide away from goal but thankfully he squared the ball back to Alvin who “tone-joed” the ball home for his 58th ARFC goal. His goal continued his red-hot scoring streak of scoring for the 7th consecutive match.

Playing under the watchful eyes of Su, Afiqah and mother-in-law, Haron could not bear to disappoint them. 7 mins later, he got his 124th ARFC goal. Tong and Alvin combined to press their player which resulted in the ball breaking loose to Haron. With a clever touch, Haron pulled away and with his renowned scoring prowess, naturally he side-footed the ball home. Once again, Afiqah smiled at the sight of his father wheeling away in celebration. 4-1 now.

In the 57th min, Sebastian almost scored but his left-foot lob was touched on to the bar by their keeper and Haron just missed with his follow-up header.

By now, Tjioe was looking for his hat-trick and he finally got it in the 67th min. Off a corner by Blackburn which created a melee pin-ball in their penalty box, Haron and Toh almost scored and the ball broker kindly for Tjioe to thump home for his 2nd ever hat-trick for ARFC.

After going 5-1 up, ARFC became complacent and let in 2 more goals for them to make it 5-3.

In the 77th min, Soon was unlucky not to add to his ARFC tally as his header goal was ruled out due to the referee spotted a foul by Toh. Unlucky Soon.

The goal of the match came in the 87th min from Hee. Sebastian’s outside foot through ball had Hee facing their keeper one-on-one. Hee then showed the watching crowd his new trick when he dummied with his right-foot and in just a split 0.7777 seconds, used his left-foot to connect with the ball. This world-class move fooled everyone in the stadia and the ball rolled gently into the net. His goal sparked delirious celebrations as it was the 1st time any footballers, fans, commentators, managers and WAGs had ever witnessed such an exquisite finish!!!!

To be fair to Hee, this was not the most significant contribution from him. His best contribution was his voluntary switching to the left-mid role when Blackburn was clearly losing the plot which created so much pressure and holes for David to plug alone. A tiring David had no choice but to be replaced by Bernard who added much-needed steel in the defence.

For this match, all played well and it was a much-improved team performance from every warrior concern. All credit to most warriors as they were asked to play in different positions in this match which they took it in their stride and performed to the best of their abilities.

ARFC in 4-1 victory

In a match against Ismail's team (Haron's brother-in-law) at Greenview SS, ARFC emerged tops with a resounding 4-1 thumping victory over them.

Scorers: Alvin's 2 goals lifted him to 57 goals, thereby edging closer and closer to Blackburn and Robin's record of 70 and 69 goals respectively.

Haron added one to bring his tally to 123 goals.

Toh scored in successive weeks and boasted his tally to 27 goals.

I was told that the Man-of-the-Match award is shared by both Blackburn and Tong, who both had dominating match.

ARFC top-ten goal-scorers

After the 29 Jun match, the top-ten goal-scorers are:

Haron - 122
Blackburn - 70
Robin - 69
Alvin - 55
Sebastian - 54
Hee - 52
Jeffrey - 48
Tjioe - 40
Khim - 32
Toh - 26

Cheers......

Edwin celebrates debut goal

Edwin was over the moon at scoring his debut goal for ARFC yesterday. What's more, it's the equalising goal for ARFC. To celebrate this occasion, Edwin will be planning an all-expenses paid trip to Club Kabuki this Friday @ 7.07 pm

All ARFC warriors (only) are welcome....

ARFC mimicked Liverpool's Istanbul come-back

ARFC performed a Liverpool-Istanbul-type 2005-performance by coming back to draw 3-3 against a very talented youthful team full of movement and passing after being down 0-3 at half-time.

Prior to kick-off, there was a big uncertainty on whether ARFC could actually field 11 warriors. Fortunately, Khim changed his family dinner to lunch and Derrick also announced his availability to play keeper even though he is still carrying an injury. Hence, kudos to both of them for putting ARFC before self which I think a lot of other warriors can also do the same in future matches.

The match was also full of ARFC supporters like Haron’s babelicious wife Su and lagi-babelicious daughter Afiqah and mother-in-law, Khim’s gorgeous wife Brenda and cute son Dylan, Blackburn’s entire cute family of his wife and 2 jewels, Elvis’ wonderful girlfriend Anna who especially flew in from Vietnam for our match and Guoxiong and his hot girlfriend Tricia.

ARFC started with this line-up:

Keeper: Speedy Hee (as talisman Derrick was late)
Right-back: Influential Sebastian
Sweeper: Uncompromising Edwin
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Unpredictable Blackburn
Centre-mid: Hardman Tjioe
Centre-mid: Dynamic Soon
Left-mid: Sublime Khim
Striker: ARFC scoring legend Haron
Striker: Powerful Alvin

Subs: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Talisman Derrick


Before the match, ARFC was warned that the opponent, though young, are decent footballers and it turned out to be very true. However, ARFC was able to contain them and in fact was having the upper hand when Haron twisted his ankle after a challenge by their impressive last man. Elvis then came on to replace Haron, with Blackburn shifting to striker while Sebastian took over the right-mid.

Haron’s departure seemed to have a demoralizing effect on ARFC and through a series of poor defending and comical goal-keeper, was down 0-3!! The score remained this way and the fans’ jaws all dropped to the ground as it was probably the first time that ARFC was down 0-3 at half-time.


In the second half, Derrick came on as keeper with Hee taking over the poor Blackburn at striker.

ARFC was clearly embarrassed by the 0-3 score-line and after a fierce tongue-lashing by Sebastian, all warriors came out determined and with big fire in their bellies. All played with new vigour and vowed to give all fans and supporters a good match.

About 7 mins after the re-start, Tjioe’s persistence paid off when he refused to give up on a seemingly lost cause right at the right edge of their penalty box. His square ball was slid home by Toh who was lurking in the 6-yard box, a goal which was almost similar to Gary Lineker’s goal against Poland in World Cup 1986 (pass from Steve Hodge). This was Toh’s 26th goal which moved him to 10th position in ARFC’s goal-scoring chart.

About 7 mins later, ARFC pulled another goal back. Again, Tjioe was the architect when his cross skimmed off the head of their defender and sailed high over their defence. Alvin too aim, leapt and plant a Miloslav Klose-like header past their keeper for his 55th ARFC goal, thereby enabling him to over-take Sebastian into the 4th position in the goal-scoring chart. 2-3 now.

With the score at 2-3, all ARFC warriors, fans and supporters alike sensed that a 3rd goal was imminent. However, despite a slew of goal-scoring chances, ARFC could not grab the 3rd goal.

In the 77th min, came the equalizing goal. Sebastian’s corner was hit low which cause a melee in the penalty box. The loose ball dropped at the feet of Edwin who was just 0.77 metres away from the goal-line. With his back to goal, Edwin grabbed his debut goal for ARFC when he mimicked Thierry Henry’s goal (think it’s against Spurs or Blackburn) when he back-heeled the ball between his legs for his first-ever ARFC goal. 3-3 now and the whole stadium erupted and many fans were seen with tears rolling down their cheeks, eliciting tears of joy!!

ARFC continued to press in its attempt to secure the winning goal but could not get the 4th goal. In fact, ARFC was nearly punished in the 87th min when the opponent took a venomous shot that looked destined for the goal. Derrick, who was impressive in goal after coming on in the 2nd half, stretched out and showed a strong hand by parrying the ball away, just like what Gary Bailey had been doing in his Man Utd years.

This was a match where ARFC was taught another foot-balling lesson in terms of movement and passing. Also, it taught ARFC never to under-estimate any opponents, be they young or old. Hence, in the space of 2 weeks, ARFC had dealt and learnt to cope with opponents with wide difference in age.

Nevertheless, I’m proud to say that ARFC had displayed its never-say-die attitude and managed to claw draws in both matches after trailing. This attitude is what made Liverpool a great team, and ARFC is a great team.

ARFC almost mimicked AC Milan's Istanbul collapse

In a Jeykell and Hyde performance, ARFC was held to a 4-4 draw by a very experienced veteran team who kept the ball extremely well.

Playing in front of its usual 77,777 which included Haron’s lovely wife, Su, and even lovelier daughter Afiqah, at the magnificent pitch at the United World College, ARFC welcomed back the injured Derrick but had to make do without Elvis and Kiat who pulled out in the last min. ARFC’s line-up is hence as follows:

Keeper: Ismail
Right-back: Unpredictable Blackburn
Sweeper: Uncompromising Edwin
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Hardworking Tong
Centre-mid: Hardman Tjioe
Centre-mid: Dynamic Soon
Left-mid: Speedy Hee
Striker: ARFC scoring legend Haron
Striker: Powerful Alvin

Subs: Influential Sebastian
Talisman Derrick


Before the match, ARFC was already warned that the experienced opponents would pass and keep possession and true enough, they were really good at passing the ball around. ARFC had no answers in the first 5 mins to their passing.

However, with virtually its first foray in their penalty box, ARFC opened the scoring. After a break down the left, the ball was centred to the central area of the penalty box and Tjioe showed nifty footwork by shuffling the ball between both his feet and expertedly stroked the ball home for his 40th ARFC goal. 1-0.

The opponents did not lose heart and almost equalized but Ismail was equal to the task. In the 27th min mark, Sebastian and Derrick came on to replace Hee and Tong respectively.

Derrick made a telling contribution almost immediately. Soon chipped in a free-kick won in the middle and Derrick broke through and reached the ball ahead of their keeper and squared the ball to the left for the on-rushing Alvin to thump home his 54th ARFC goal. This goal moved him level with Sebastian in the joint-4th position in the ARFC scoring chart. 2-0.


Sebastian then made the double substitution worked perfectly to plan when he sent in a high through ball right to the lurking Haron in the centre circle. As Haron was in our own half, the opponent appealed in vain for an off-side decision and Haron duly sped clear and with his calibre, how could he miss? He rounded the keeper and easily slid the ball home for his 122nd ARFC goal. Once again, a smile appeared on Afiqah’s cute face when the ball hit the net……..3-0 at half-time.

When 2nd half resumed, ARFC experienced the most bizarre collapse in its illustrious history, even worse than AC Milan’s Istanbul melt-down, when it conceded 4 goals to trail by 3-4.

Luckily, about mins before the end, Tjioe latched on to a loose ball and touched the ball high and over their defence to Alvin who broke clear. Alvin used his outer-right foot to square the ball to Derrick who was totally unmarked and he lashed the ball for the equalizer for his 19th ARFC goal.

ARFC could have snatched the winning goal but the referee turned a blind eye after Derrick and clearly and brutally brought down by their keeper. Unlucky!!

This was a match where no particular ARFC warrior stood out. Almost all put in mediocre performance thought credit should not be taken away from the experienced opponent that taught ARFC a valuable lesson on passing and keeping possession in matches.

Monday, June 16, 2008

ARFC overcome Manchester United Supporters' Club (Spore Branch)

Inspired by Huiming’s performance, ARFC overcame a stubborn, resilient and youthful Manchester United Supporters’ Club (Singapore Branch) 2-0 in front of its fans including Elvis’ gorgeous girlfriend, Anna, and Kiat’s lovely wife and daughter Josephine and Teajanz respectively.

Before the match, ARFC was rocked by the withdrawal of 121-goal scoring legend Haron due to fever. ARFC’s line-up is as follows:

Keeper: Dependable Jinzhong
Right-back: Determined Huiming
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Hardworking Tong
Centre-mid: Hardman Tjioe
Centre-mid: Influential Sebastian
Left-mid: Sublime Khim
Striker: Unpredictable Blackburn
Striker: Powerful Alvin

Subs: Dynamic Soon
Speedy Hee
Versatile Kiat


As in its usual match, ARFC tried to seize proceedings from the match go but the opponent was no easy nut to crack with their fast forwards and quick closing down of play. ARFC’s defence stood firm and easily waved off their attacks.

Just 7 mins into the match, ARFC won a free-kick on the left when Khim was fouled. Sebastian’s free-kick sailed high over their defence and their hapless defender deflected the ball into the net for an own goal. To the whole world’s astonishment, the referee chalked off the goal when he blew for a foul but was unable to pin-point the offence and the offender. Strange!!

After some chances went abegging, ARFC finally opened the scoring. Blackburn’s long throw from the right landed at the feet of Alvin who turned and laid the ball to Khim on the left of the penalty box. Showing his nifty footwork ala Zidane, Khim side-stepped his shadowing defender, swiveled and lashed the ball home for his 32nd ARFC goal. The goal had the stadium turned wild.

Kiat, Soon and Hee then came on to replace Khim, Tjioe and Alvin respectively in the first half but the score remained 1-0.


In the second half, ARFC again came close to double its lead but was denied either by their keeper or defenders. The opponents threatened to equalize but ARFC’s defence once again put on a world-class display by easily repelling their attacks. Particularly, Huiming and Toh were extremely impressive while Elvis and Bernard were no slouch either. Jinzhong also showed a safe pair of hands once again. Tong also combined effectively with Huiming to make ARFC’s right-side a fortress.

By the 70th min mark, ARFC was clearly tiring and was on the back-foot. Hee even had to play as a lone forward at one stage which he did impressively and had one of his best performance in an ARFC jersey.

After some more near misses, Alvin finally settled ARFC’s nerves with a late goal. Elvis, who once again led ARFC’s defence admirably, chipped a ball forward which dropped right at the feet of Alvin. With a sharp turn, Alvin accelerated forward and duly thumped home his 53rd ARFC goal even though their keeper got a touch to it. 2-0 and this was ARFC’s 141st victory.

Man-of-the-Match? Very close between Huiming and Toh, but I would choose Huiming ahead of Toh, but only very slight difference.

After the match, some journalists were perplexed at the decision to drop Soon from the starting line-up. This caused ARFC Board of Directors to issue a statement that reads:

“No doubt Soon has been impressive so far and has attracted the attention of several leading overseas clubs. However, seniority has to be observed and respected and therefore Soon has to bid his time and play more matches first. This is similar to the case of Alvin who was reserve in his earlier ARFC matches but has since established to be the leading forward for ARFC.”

ARFC DVD sold-out

Dear ARFC warriors:

Good stuff spread very fast.

I just received news that all our first-print of 77,777 copies of ARFC DVDs were snapped up within 77 minutes after they were available.

The second re-print of 77,777 copies will be available 7 days later. It is expected to sell-out too, as there are already 77,777 reserved orders....

DVD on everything about ARFC finally ready!!!!

Dear ARFC warriors:

I have earlier promised you all a magazine on ARFC. However, I have checked and found the cost to be rather prohibitive. Hence, I decided to churn out a DVD instead.

I am proud to announce that the DVD is finally ready after months of agony, pressuring some ARFC warriors into submitting their data, toiling way into some nights since my computer skills are so-so only, and enduring lots of scoldings from my wife, Caren, for neglecting her and putting so much time and effort into the DVD.

Some of you have received your copy during yesterday's match at Bedok North SS. For those who have not received, pl try your best to turn up for our next match so that I can pass the DVD personally to you.

Hope you guys enjoy the DVD. It encapsulates everything that you need to know about ARFC -its history, warriors and their loved ones and all statistics.....

Cheers...

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

ARFC snatched last-grasp victory

On the back of yet another super-impressive and world-class performance by ARFC’s defence of Elvis, Toh, David and Bernard, ARFC overcame a stubborn Yellow Submarine 4-3 in front of 77, 777 fans at Meridien Junior College on Saturday. The fans included Alvin’s gorgeous girlfriend Irene and Haron’s babelicious wife Su and future-babelicious daughter Afiqah.

Before the match, ARFC was hit by the late withdrawal of Tjioe. Fearing for the worse, Alvin was persuaded to come for the match despite his swollen eye which thankfully he did. Soon also agreed to play for just one half as he had dinner on.

Line-up as follows:

Keeper: Dependable Jinzhong
Right-back: Reliable David
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Unpredictable Blackburn
Centre-mid: Dynamic Soon
Centre-mid: Influential Sebastian
Left-mid: Sublime Khim
Striker: Speedy Hee
(Powerful Alvin joined the match later.)

Sub: ARFC scoring legend Haron (came slightly late due to wedding reception)

Also, versatile Kiat put aeroplane as he totally disappeared even though he said he would come. Sources revealed that he was again at Little India mingling and polishing his African language with his African friends which he befriended after his recent trip to South Africa and Namibia.

Both teams started with 10 players but the opponent had 11 just minutes into the match. ARFC, however, had the upper hand with some impressive harassing, passing and support, with Soon particularly impressive. Hence, it was no surprised when ARFC opened the scoring with 10 men in the 7th min. Blackburn won the ball on the right and passed to Soon who made a foray into the penalty box and pulling a defender with him. Left with a gap, Soon spotted Hee free and squared the ball to Hee who needed no second invitation to slot the ball home for his 52nd ARFC goal. 1-0

Indeed, Soon was so impressive that he could have scored 2 goals in quick succession but he just placed the ball wide on both occasions.

ARFC was not to be denied for its 2nd goal which arrived in the 17th min. Alvin won a corner which was taken by Blackburn who delivered a measured ball into the box. Both Toh and Khim jumped for it and surprisingly Khim reached the ball ahead of Toh and powered a ball through the legs of their keeper. It was Khim’s 31st ARFC goal and it was later gathered that this was Khim’s first-ever headed goal in his career. 2-0.

About 7 mins after scoring, Khim was injured by a tackle and was replaced by Haron who was greeted with huge cheers from the fans. Hee then dropped to left midfield with Haron partnering Alvin up front.

After securing a 2-goal lead, ARFC seemed to turn complacent which allowed the opponents to pull level at half-time.

Soon had to leave at half-time and initially David had to leave as well. Luckily, David sought the permission of Marco who told him to stay for the match. ARFC then had 11 players left.

In the 57th min, ARFC regained its lead. Khim won a free-kick about 37 metres from goal and both Blackburn and Sebastian lined up to take the free-kick. Seing Khim lurking just inside the penalty box, Sebastian played a quick ground ball/wall pass with Khim and ran to the edge of the penalty box. Khim read his move perfectly and paid on the ball for Sebastian to simple side-foot the ball home which fooled their keeper completely as he was anticipating a shot. 3-2 and it was Sebastian’s 54th ARFC goal.

Jinzhong then pulled off 2 great saves to preserve ARFC’s lead. One save was hugely impressive when he saved at point-blank range.

However, the opponent leveled the score again in the 67th min. 3-3.

From the 70th min point onwards, all ARFC warriors were tiring and the opponents capitalized by making full use of their 4 or 5 substitutes. ARFC was now hanging on and most were nearing cramps. The fans played their part by cheering them on.

With mins to go, ARFC snatched the winning goal. Blackburn played a quick throw-in to Haron on the right flank. With a deft touch, Haron elegantly flicked the ball into the penalty box for Alvin who came in from the blind side. Alvin seemed to be second best to win the ball from their covering defender and keeper but his determination and persistence paid off when he nicked the ball ahead of them, used his body strength to get ahead, volleyed the ball home and tumbled thereafter for the winning goal and his 52nd ARFC goal. The whole stadium erupted and Irene was spotted dancing up and down. Even Afiqah was stunned by her father’s flick and awareness, and Alvin’s stunning goal.

This was a match where every warrior gave their all despite just 11 warriors in the second half and no one to change. Though 3 goals were conceded, I must say that ARFC’s defence and keeper were most impressive especially with the off-side play and their constant repelling of their attacks. All in all, this victory would not be possible without ARFC’s defence.

Man-of-the-Match? Very close between Elvis and Bernard, but I would choose Bernard ahead of Elvis, but only slightly.