Sunday, May 25, 2008

ARFC thumped Marauders 5-1

Following up on his superb 4-goal feat last week, hard-man Tjioe put in a Man-of-the-Match performance to drive ARFC to a resounding 5-1 victory over Marauders at Broadrick Sec Sch. The match was witnessed by 77,777 fans which included Huiming’s wife, Yanxiu, and an additional 777 diners at the Old Airport Road Hawker Centre which is directly opposite the field.

Before the match, reliable David announced his availability which partially off-set the absence of many ARFC stalwarts, in particular ARFC scoring legend Haron who was away in Perak for a weekend training stint under the former Perak coach M Karuthu.

Line-up as follows:

Keeper: Dependable Jinzhong
Right-back: Determined Huiming
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Reliable David
Right-mid: Hardworking Tong
Centre-mid: Hard-man Tjioe
Centre-mid: Influential Sebastian
Left-mid: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Striker: Powerful Alvin
Striker: Speedy Hee

Sub: Unpredictable Blackburn (slightly late due to work)


When the referee blew the kick-off whistle, ARFC wasted no time in harassing opponents to try to stamp its authority on the match. With impressive passing and movements, ARFC quickly gained the upper hand.

In the 17th min, ARFC opened the scoring courtesy of a great pass by David. Receiving the ball at left-back, David gradually moved the ball up and Bernard made a great decoy run at the left flank and pulled a player with him. With a gap opening up, David executed a world-class slide-rule pass with perfect velocity and accuracy on the ground to Alvin who simply had to turn away from their defender and beat their keeper for his 49th ARFC goal. David’s pass had Martin Taylor exclaiming that even Platini and Zidane would be very proud of.

However, ARFC could not add to its tally though its passes and creating of chances were impressive.

ARFC’s stingy defence, powered by Toh and led by Elvis with able support from Huiming and David, stood out with its clever off-side play and vital interceptions. Brilliant and simply world-class!!

Blackburn then took over Bernard at the 30th min mark. Half-time remains 1-0.

During the half-time, ARFC pioneer warrior Huiming gave away the following prizes:

Blackburn – for scoring ARFC’s 800th goal and his 70th goal for ARFC last week;
Hee and Sebastian – for scoring their 50th ARFC goal;

In the 2nd half, ARFC added its lead 7 mins after the re-start. Alvin’s persistence paid off handsomely when he used his power to win the ball in the penalty area and before any of their defenders and keeper could react, he used his outside right-foot to thump home his 2nd goal of the match and his 50th ARFC goal.

In the 57th min, Alvin piled on more misery on the opponent. Sebastian’s volleyed cross from the right was met sweetly by Alvin who expertly headed home a well-placed header ala Tim Cahill for his 51st ARFC goal and chalking up his 6th ARFC hat-tricks.

7 mins later came the save of the match and possibly the year 2008. Their opponent broke our off-side trap and faced Jinzhong one-on-one. He placed his shot which appeared to have beaten Jinzhong but Jinzhong showed amazing reflex by quickly going down on his left and pushed the ball away for a corner. This save is absolutely world-class which Oliver Kahn and Peter Cech would be proud of.

However, the opponent pulled a goal back. 1-3.

Hee then almost scored a goal in the 77th min but his superb free-kick hit the cross-bar.

Seconds later, ARFC restored its 3-goal margin. Tjioe, who was imperious at central midfield, played a ball to Sebastian who had switched to right mid. Looking up, his long cross sailed over their retreating keeper who could not prevent the ball from going n despite getting a touch to it. Fluke, luck or prefect technique? Perhaps a combination of all three elements but nevertheless his 53rd ARFC goal.

ARFC was not done yet. In the dying mins, Huiming mirrored David’s creation by hitting a great ball down the right flank to Hee who looked suspiciously off-side. When the referee waved play on, Hee quickly took up the invitation by well, speeding clear and beat their keeper with a well-placed shot for his 51st ARFC goal.

Once again, credit must be given to ARFC’s defence for yet another no-nonsense display. All stood out, but Toh topped the lot when he put in a typical-Toh-like performance. David also lasted the whole match which was a surprise to all fans present. Of course, Elvis and Huiming gave nothing away. Tong also put in a hardworking shift in midfield.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Top ARFC goal-scorers (20 goals and above)

After today's match, this is the top hit-list:

ARFC scoring legend Haron - 121
Unpredictable Blackburn - 70
Deadly Robin - 69
Influential Sebastian - 52
Speedy Hee - 50
Powerful Alvin - 48
WO Neo - 48
Hard-man Tjioe - 39
Sublime Khim - 30
Versatile Kiat & Towering Toh - 25 each
Reliable David - 23
Hardworking Tong - 22
Jiong-jiong (ex-player) - 21

Unpredictable Blackburn over-takes deadly Robin

Unpredictable Blackburn became the 2nd ARFC warrior (after Haron) to over-take Robin's 69-goals tally after his hat-trick today.

ARFC Board of Directors is now looking into giving him a memento (just like what Haron received when he achieved the feat).

This is Blackburn's 2nd milestone in successive weeks. Last week, he netted ARFC's 800th goals in its history.

First-time hat-trick ARFC warriors

With his superb 4-goal feat in the crushing 9-2 victory, Tjioe has joined the elite band of ARFC hat-trick heroes.

In the same match, Blackburn's hat-trick is the FIRST TIME that he has scored 3 goals in a match for ARFC. I was shocked (and I am sure this would surprise most ARFC warriors especially the 90s ARFC warriors as well) when I checked our archive!!!!

Fantastic achievement for both Tjioe and Blackburn!!!

Congratulations!!!

ARFC destroyed Team Blue 9-2

Propelled by hard-man Tjioe, ARFC crushed an insipid blue team 9-2 in front of 77,777 fans at Yio Chu Kang Sec Sch. Amongst the fans were Caren, wife of influential Sebastian, Dora and Marco Mak, wife and son of reliable David Mak, and the injured talisman Derrick.

Before the match, the fans saluted unpredictable Blackburn for scoring ARFC’s 800th goal. His wife and 2 daughters were also present to soak up the salutation.

Line-up as follows:

Keeper: ARFC scoring legend Haron!!!!!
Right-back: Reliable David
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Influential Sebastian
Centre-mid: Hard-man Tjioe
Centre-mid: Dynamic Soon
Left-mid: Hardworking Tong
Striker: Powerful Alvin
Striker: Unpredictable Blackburn

Subs:

Uncompromising Edwin
Speedy Hee (only arrived in the 2nd half)


The fans were still making their way to their seats when ARFC opened the scoring. Bernard’s perfect high through ball saw Tjioe breaking through from the middle ala Steven Gerrard and slotted the ball home for his 36th ARFC goal.

7 mins later, ARFC doubled its lead. After some clever play by Alvin, Tjioe was unceremoniously upended by their defender. Tjioe picked himself up and sent their keeper the wrong way. 2-0.

Haron, who was surprisingly deployed as keeper which drew loud boos from the fans as they wanted to see his legendary scoring instinct. However, Haron showed that he is also capable as keeper when he read some opponents’ through balls well and smothered the danger.

Tjioe then completed his hat-trick in the 27th min. Blackburn paid the ball nicely for him about 37 metres out. Without breaking his stride, he thundered in a shot that sailed high over their keeper ala Steven Gerrard for his 38th ARFC goal. His hat-trick prompted every female fans to chant “Tjioe Tjioe is my chio chio!” for 7 mins.

Edwin came on to replace Elvis who received a knock on his back. Edwin marshaled the defence well but he was let down by his defenders in the 37th min when he was left exposed when their well-built midfielder charged in all the way into the penalty box. Edwin gave a challenge but was deemed by the referee to have brought him down. The penalty was converted. 1-3.

ARFC however, regained its 3-goal cushion when their keeper sent his clearance straight to the waiting Blackburn about 27 metres out. Looking up, Blackburn executed a Glenn Hoddle chip over their keeper for his 68th ARFC goal. 4-1

Half-time 4-1.

Hee then arrived in the 2nd half replacing Sebastian who had a poor match by his standards. David went into goal and Blackburn replaced Bernard at left-back.

Just mins after the re-start, David was hesitant which allowed them to pull a goal back. 4-2.

ARFC scored its 5th goal quite immediately. Their defender handled the ball in the box and a penalty was awarded. In front of his watching wife and daughters, Blackburn’s weak penalty was saved but he reacted the fastest to the loose ball and touched home for his 69th ARFC, thereby equaling deadly Robin’s 69 ARFC goals which was only previously over-taken by Haron.

Tjioe was not done yet. In the 57th min, he again thundered a shot from 27 metres out and the ball squirmed under the body of their keeper. 6-2. Clearly, Tjioe was benefiting from the shield afforded by Soon and he had no reservations at storming forward.

Blackburn completed his hat-trick when he turned the clock back 10 years when his venomous rocket had their keeper beaten all the way. Blackburn was obviously inspired by his wife and daughters’ presence. With this 70th goal, Blackburn finally over-took Robin’s tally for ARFC.

Soon capped an impressive display when he scored his 3rd ARFC goal after he picked up Tong’s shot which came off the cross-bar. 8-2.

Tong had the final say when he also powered in a shot which had goal screaming all the way for his 22nd ARFC goal.

ARFC also benefited from the good defensive work by Edwin, Toh and Elvis who gave nothing away. Even though the regular scorers, Alvin and Haron did not find the net which was a HUGE surprise, they worked their socks off with their clever movement and off-the-ball running which had their defence chasing shadows.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Dynamic Soon attracts attention from top clubs

After yet another impressive display for ARFC, dynamic Soon has attracted the attention of top clubs like Liverpool, Barcelona, AC Milan and Inter Milan.

Bids of around 77 million pounds are tabled by the 4 clubs who viewed Soon as the ideal replacement for Xavi Alonso, Ronaldinho, Kaka and Patrick Vieira.

The ARFC Board of Directors, however, has turned down all offers which it thought was seriously under-valued.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

ARFC's 800th goal in its history

With his free-kick goal against Team Orange, Unpredictable Blackburn has scored ARFC's 800th goal in its illustrious history.

Congratulations!!!

ARFC crushed Team Orange 8-3

Playing in front of 107,777 fans, ARFC crushed Team Orange 8-3.

The additional 30,000 fans were mainly there to witness the 2nd official appearance of dynamic Soon as words got around that he was a great bargain at $77 million. As a result of the huge surge in the number of fans, jams were spotted as far back as the PIE and Mustaffa Centre.

Prior to the match, versatile Kiat pulled out due to unknown reasons. Fortunately, speedy Hee turned down his hot date with Andrea Fonseka and turned out for ARFC.

Line-up is hence as follows:

Keeper: Dependable Jinzhong
Right-back: Influential Sebastian
Sweeper: Astute-reading sweeper Elvis
Stopper: Towering Toh
Left-back: Left-foot wizard Bernard
Right-mid: Hardworking Tong
Centre-mid: Hard-man Tjioe
Centre-mid: Dynamic Soon
Left-mid: Speedy Hee
Striker: Powerful Alvin
Striker: Unpredictable Blackburn

No subs.


ARFC wasted no time in seizing the initiative and it was no surprise when Alvin opened the scoring. In the 7th min, influential Sebastian’s delightful long and high ball from the right found Alvin breaking free. He turned his marker inside-out and beat the keeper for his 45th ARFC goal.

Just minutes later, ARFC went 2-0 up. Hardworking Tong’s precise cross from almost the right bye-line was expertly headed home by Alvin. Wonderful and Peter Crouch should really learn from him.

In the 27th min, talisman Derrick, who would be out for at least 2 months due to his torn right ligament, turned up to lend his support and he was immediately treated to a delicious hat-trick from Alvin. Soon threaded a ball to Hee on the left who sprinted clear and passed the ball to Blackburn. Hearing a call for the ball, Blackburn teed up nicely for Alvin who used his outside foot and shot home for his hat-trick. It was an almost perfect hat-trick as he had scored with his right foot and head but not the left-foot.

The icing on the cake came in the 37th min. Toh was crudely fouled just 7 metres outside the penalty box. Before anyone could move, Blackburn pushed everyone aside and attempted to curl the ball towards the left-hand corner. The ball took a wicked deflection off their defender’s head and wrong-footed the keeper for his 67th ARFC goal.

Blackburn’s goal also reached a milestone as it was ARFC’s 800th goal in its illustrious history!!

Just mins before the end of the 1st half, Soon dribbled all the way into the box and beat their keeper for his 2nd ARFC goal, thereby justifying the faith shown by the ARFC fans in turning up to support him.

5-0.

In the 2nd half, ARFC did not let its guard down. 7 mins from the re-start, Alvin lobbed the ball over the keeper and Tong dashed in from the blind-side on the right and cushioned the ball home for his 21st ARFC goal!!

Team Orange pulled a goal back after their free-kick was headed home by their forward as no one was tracking him. 1-6.

Undeterred, ARFC pressed on and got its 7th goal of the match. Hee looked up and saw Tong lurking on the right. His high ball to Tong appeared to be in no danger until their panicky defender dashed in from don’t-know-where and head past their keeper for a comical own-goal. 1-7.

ARFC was not done yet. In the 77th min, Alvin got his 4th goal of the match after he was put through. His initial save was well-saved by their keeper but Alvin reacted the fastest to side-foot the ball into the empty net. This is his 48th ARFC goal.

Jinzhong then pulled off 2 world-class one-on-one saves to keep the score down. His saves were all the more commendable as he has virtually nothing to do for the whole match yet maintain his alertness.

Hee then attempted to do one better than Alvin’s worst miss in ARFC’s history when he hit the post from 2.7 metres and with no one around him at all!! With the miss, it is now the 2nd-worst miss in ARFC’s history.

With mins to go, some of Team Orange’s players suddenly pleaded with the referee to end the match early to end their suffering. They were persuaded to carry on.

This proved to be a distraction to ARFC as suddenly Toh and amazingly Soon gifted 2 goals to them after their ball was intercepted. 3-8.

Speaking to the gathering PRC dancers from Dragonfly, Alvin was ecstatic at his 4-goal feat. “I hope the 4 goals will make-up for my horrendous miss last week. To show my sincerity, any ARFC warrior and their family members can take my taxi FOC for the next 7 days.”

Friday, May 09, 2008

ARFC Fund Balance

Dear ARFC warriors:

As of 09 May 08, our ARFC fund balance is $135.

Presently, the ARFC Board of Directors is contemplating a collection of $10 per warrior per match to cover match-day fees. Any left-over (if any) will be added to the ARFC Fund for future use......

I believe that all of us now are gainfully employed, and surely this $10 is nothing compared to the jugs of beer, packets of cigarettes, boxes of condoms consumed and visits to health centres, night-clubs, discos and pubs in our daily/weekly/monthly/yearly daillances......

:)

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Towering Toh's towering header seals victory for ARFC

Playing under a very good and cool weather on the artificial pitch at 1st Toa Payoh Sec Sch, the scene where ARFC was interviewed by The New Paper for its Weekend Warriors series on 13 Jan 08, ARFC totally dominated proceedings but could only yield a 2-1 victory. The triumph was achieved in front of the usual 77,777 fans which included reliable David’s lovely wife, Dora, and his even lovelier son, Marco; and astute-reading sweeper Elvis’s girlfriend Anna and friends.

Prior to kick-off, ARFC officially welcomed 2 new warriors, dynamic Soon and uncompromising Edwin, into its fold. Both warriors were also treated to loud and warm applauses from the fans for 7 minutes non-stop.

Line-up:

Dependable Jinzhong - Goalkeeper;
Astute-reading sweeper Elvis - Sweeper;
Towering Toh - Stopper;
Left-foot wizard Bernard - Left-back;
Determined Huiming - Right-back;
Influential Sebastian - Central Mid;
Hard-man Tjioe - Central Mid;
Hardworking Tong - Right Mid;
Speedy Hee - Left Mid;
Unpredictable Blackburn - Striker;
ARFC scoring legend Haron - Striker

Subs:

Powerful Alvin
Versatile Kiat
Reliable David
Dynamic Soon
Uncompromising Edwin


ARFC was determined to end its 3-match winless streak and hence it was no surprise that ARFC quickly got off the starting blocks with some explosive attacking display. With both forwards impressing, ARFC created some decent chances but could not make them count. Haron, who had bouts of diahoerrea in the morning, struggled with his shots which were clearly devoid of power. Speedy Hee also left a deep impression with several, well, speedy runs on the left flank.

With almost total domination, it did not shock the audience when ARFC opened the scoring in the 17th min. Haron was fouled yet again and Blackburn shrugged Sebastian aside to take the free-kick. From 27 metres out, Blackburn’s ball appeared to be well-saved by their keeper but he inexplicably dropped the ball. Despite strong protest, the eagle-eyed referee, who had a great match, spotted that the ball had crossed the line and signaled a goal, thereby giving Blackburn’s 66th goal, just 4 more to beat deadly Robin’s tally of 69 goals.

In the 27th min, after a neat exchange of passes with Blackburn, Sebastian sprinted clear and faced their keeper one-on-one. However, he was in two minds on whether to shoot or pass to David, who had embarked a rare sprint all the way into the penalty box, and eventually shot tamely straight at the keeper. With this attempt, Sebastian had illustrated that he would NEVER be as deadly as top-notch strikers like Alvin and Haron.

This waste chance soon came back to haunt ARFC. Off a counter-attack 7 mins later, the opponent leveled the score.

A string of substitutions took place with Kiat, David (came on earlier) and Alvin taking the place of Tjioe, Hee and Haron. In line with ARFC’s tradition, new warriors were not fielded in the first half.

In the 2nd half, Soon and Edwin came on to replace Sebastian and Elvis respectively to show the fans what they are capable of. Indeed, both did not disappoint as they impressed with their pace and intelligence display.

In the 57th min, Soon nearly scored after being put through by Alvin but his shot missed the post by a mere 1.77 inches.

7 mins later, Haron was crudely brought down as he was heading straight at goal, giving the referee no choice but to dismiss the offending defender. Sportingly, ARFC allowed them to replace the sacked player. From the resulting free-kick, Edwin shot well wide after a short lay-off by Blackburn.

ARFC finally regained the lead 7 mins later. Alvin flighted in a delightful corner and up went, who else but Toh to, well, tower above all and thumped in a header for his 25th ARFC goal. His goal had the fans chanting “Toh, Oh, Oh, Oh!!!” non-stop for almost 7 minutes.

In the 77th min came the miss of the season, and possibly the worst since ARFC was founded in 1991. Off Tong’s brilliant through-ball down the right flank, Hee sped off and whipped in a cross that eluded everybody all the way into the 6-yard box. With just 0.0777 inches from the goal line, Alvin somehow managed to scoop the ball over the cross-bar!!!!! This miss mirrored Kanu’s and Rosenthal’s mss for West Brom and Liverpool respectively years back.

ARFC finished strongly and managed to create some more chances but were not converted. Eventually, ARFC held on for a 2-1 victory.

Elvis, Kiat and Man-of-the-Match Toh attended the post-match media conference. Elvis thanked the fans and Anna for their unwavering support and vowed to lose more weight to steer off the competition from Edwin; Kiat also spoke of the fears that either he, Sebastian, Tjioe and Tong would be dislodged by the super-impressive and Mascherano-type midfielder in Soon;

Toh, meanwhile, was ecstatic to have netted the match-winner and dedicated his winning goal to his son Gerrard.